WHAT box of wine???

Since my gal Meghoo enjoys having a box of wine around the house, just in case she feels like having a glass after a hard days work, I made her this craft for Christmas. Today I was walking around a thrift store and saw a few books that all had one common theme: shitty daytime tv hostesses. Because I think that I am really funny, I decided to buy them plus a box of wine and make one for myself. Here's the end product. Just try and call me out for having a box of wine in my room. You can't even see it. The only shame around here is that George Lopez's "Why You Crying?" wouldn't fit and had to go to waste.

Hey!

It's Friday! Let's all listen to this song about it!

PARTY ANIMAL 

And then this jam!

212

Space Jams

I wrote my last exam for this crazy ass semester today, Solar System Astronomy. This is a super interesting subject I haven't given much thought to, so I'm glad I took the course.. I could have done without the tests though. My professor should understand that I am forced to take this class, as it is a requirement for my arts degree, my mark should be based on the mere fact that I found some of the material we went over in class amazing, and I now sometimes think about the Universe outside of class. Whatever.

Because I am a terrible student, I started making Astronomy themed playlists instead of studying. These are a bunch of songs with the theme of planets, stars and space in general.

You can listen to it here!


To show that the Solar Systems aren't just something that make me want to dick around on the computer instead of learning about them, these are some of the fun facts I learned this year:

• Yes, David Bowie, there might be some life on Mars.  This lil guy has polar caps of frozen CO2.  In the summer the ice caps shrink leaving water-ice caps underneath, exposing dark zones of vegetation that bloom and spread.
• Jupiter has a fat belly because he spins so fast that the equator bulges.  A day on Jupiter is 10 hours long which is crazy for such a huge planet.  There's also a "Great Red Spot" on Jupiter that is a stable storm.. what's "mysterious" about this storm is that its spinning counter-clockwise while the winds on Jup are blowing opposite.
• Jupiter has the best moons.  Io's got active volcanoes going on and Europa's surface is a 20 km thick crust of flexible ice and it's a prime spot to check for signs of life.  Ganymede is a huge  moon, bigger than Mercury that has salty oceans, and Callisto just might hold the secret to every aging woman's dream:  its surface is covered in craters, but there's only a few under 100m in diameter, which means the crust is soft enough to erase these features over time.
• Saturn's rings are made of mostly ice and rock, are very unstable and constantly lose their matter .. but thanks to a couple of moons that act like Border Collie's herding sheep they keep all the matter in check and the rings looking brand new, 4.6 billion years later!

New New Years Resolution

Going for breakfast after a night out is a great idea, if there's delicious options. I don't mind spending $20 on a nice brekky if I dont feel like a piece of shit afterwards. But how many times have you gone out for a meal with friends, only to realize that was actually the worst possible thing you could have put in your body, it tasted like garbage and robbed you of nearly $20? I have this problem almost every single time I go out to eat in this city filled with generic chain restaurants and only greasy spoon breakfast places to choose from.

The last straw was when I met two of my best friends for breakfast a few weeks ago. We were supposed to meet at Smitty's, and as I was approaching this gem situated in the Brandon Shoppers Mall, I got a text saying the only spot left was in the lounge. Ugh. So I walked past all of the families and young folks out for their unmemorable breakfast, through the swinging cowboy doors to the VLT lined lounge. It was pretty funny, we shared a laugh and agreed we were lucky that it was early enough that this place wasn't bumpin with VLT addicted weirdos drinking Budweiser's, eyes glued to the three screens they're playing because using just one VLT isn't enough.

When it came down to order, I chose a scrambler. Or skillet. Or whatever they're called. This was a gamble in itself, because I can never remember which place it is that blobs 7-11-esque "free cheese" all over the eggs. Anyway, when our food came out I was immediately disappointed. It was a "laughable meal." My sausage was cut in half length wise, but not all the way through so it was still just one sausage, and then sliced the other way, but again not all the way through so it was just a massacre of what once was a farmer sausage. The painfully shy and awkward 13 year old serving us wasn't able to get those mushrooms in there as I had politely asked for, and my toast was completely burnt. When I asked for new toast, it came out so soaked in butter that it was clear. I know I sound like a dick. But when I went to pay and it's close to $20 for literally the crappiest meal I've ever seen, I get a little cranky.

More than complaining about the shitty restaurants in Brandon, I want to talk about how nice it is to make meals at home with family or friends. It's one of my favorite things to do, and what's nicer than making delicious food for people that you love? Some of my favorite memories of hanging out with friends revolve around the meals we've made. Just throw on a nice morning album, make a huge pot of strong coffee, converse and laugh and talk about the previous night just like you would at a greasy spoon restaurant but be satisfied knowing that you made the food yourself, it was probably way more delicious, and was at least a third of the price. Maybe if you're not into Applebees or Boston Pizza you should grab a box of wine, get some groceries and collectively make a big dinner. Chances are with enough wine you'll even end up venturing out afterwards and potentially have a great night!

Homemade breakfast from one of the best cooks I know, Kat

Chicken Dinner bonding with family

BBQ's are the best.

Making sushi with a bunch of gals: delicious! fun!

I waste my money on enough useless crap that I don't need to add 'being dissatisfied' or '10lbs' to my list. My new New Years Resolution is to make most meals at home, or someone elses home, while having a great time with friends or fam. That way I can never complain again when I get this placed in front me:

Gold Nose

Well, this girl seems pretty awesome

YESSSSSSS!

http://www.secretsareback.com/

OH MY GOD... of Jacob, Issac and Abraham

GET THIS. I'm so excited. A school friend of mine put this on Facebook today. This is one of my professors for two of my classes this semester. Although he pisses me off, how cute and hilarious is this video. He even wrote it.



Hit up the Kevin Wong channel if that one left you wanting more. My afternoon is com-PLETE! http://www.youtube.com/user/kwbrandon1

July

I had only heard a few Youth Lagoon songs this fall, but the first time I gave it a good listen was when my bestie Katy and I were driving around late at night on a Saturday. We didn't know what we felt like doing, but we just knew we didn't want to go home. We decided to go "find Danny" at The Roadhouse, one of the two bars in Brandon. Sitting in the Lumina-sine we smoked cigarettes and listened to the beautiful album The Year of Hibernation as all the disgustingly drunk patrons of The Roadhouse stumbled out. Short, vagina exposing skirts and dudes with their collars popped were surrounding our vehicle like taquito hungry zombies. With the windows rolled up tight so they couldn't smell our soberness and ask for a cigarette or a ride, we sat there laughing at the mess that was in front of us while waiting for our friend and listening to what I think is one of the best albums of 2011.

The first time I saw this video I was pretty shocked. I had noooo idea that this was a dude singing. I was freaked out by it for a few weeks, but eventually got over the fact that it wasn't a shy and adorable little girl fronting the band. I'm back in bidnizz with Youth Lagoon and have been listening to it all day!

California Dreamin'

You know what really grinds my gears? Winter. So far we've been spoiled with crazy warm weather, so the recent dip in the temperature feels extra terrible. Even though it's only been a few days since it's been shitty cold I've found myself thinking about my California trip last spring. These are a few pictures that I've recently been staring at longingly.

Grimes - Genesis

I've had this song on repeat for the last little while, which I'm a little surprised at. I have a hard time with Grimes, for one superficial reason. The littthhhp. It's not so much that you can hear it as you can see it when she's singing in her videos and live performances. I feel like I have 4 or 5 speech impediments myself, so watching her and seeing her speech impediments kind of makes me feel weird. Like if you soberly watched a video of yourself being a drunk asshole.

But apparently I'm getting better, I'm working on it anyway. I'm not about to sit down and watch an interview but this songs got me dancing!

Yourstru.ly presents: Grimes "Genesis" from Yours Truly on Vimeo.

King Rides By

Last spring when I was in LA (I know, right?) my girl Lisa and I saw one single celebrity. Ok well she was the one to point it out, but I swear I saw him too. With her stammering "it's, it's, it's Phoebe's brother! From Friends!" we finally we able to figure out that it was Giovanni Ribisi that we had seen.

Word on the street is that Ribisi has been dating Cat Power for the last year. So not only did we spot a celebrity. We saw Cat Powers mother fucking boyfriend. That's huge for little fan girls like myself. Maybe Chan was sitting in the car, smoking and looking super cool, waiting for him to grab a couple of burritos from the farmers market we had seen him at. We will never know.

Cat Power has apparently been working on a new album. It doesn't have a release date yet, but should be out mid-2012. It's not for a while, but still exciting, especially after hearing one of her "new" jams, King Rides By. This song was originally on What Would the Community Think but Marshall collaborated with Flo Rida to come up with this hip twist on an old favorite. Just jokes. No Flo Rida. But the new version definitely sounds like music from 2012, which I am not mad about at all. (Sidenote: should we be calling these years 'the tweens?') I think it's super cool that Marshall is tweaking her sound, and I think this song is JUST THE BEST!

This video is starring Filipino boxer and politician Manny Pacquiao, and was directed by Chan Marshall's mother fucking boyfriend Giovanni Ribisi! Cool hey?

Jimmy Fallon and The War on Drugs

When I first saw this video I thought to myself, 'how great are The War on Drugs!' Next I thought, 'how amazing and adorable is Questlove?! And then I thought to myself, 'wait a minute, is this a dumb skit where Jimmy Fallon plays each of the band members? Is this a joke? Are The War on Drugs being made fun of? Seriously, Jimmy Fallon might actually be pretending to be the singer.. is it cause Kurt Vile quit? They need a new singer and this is the joke? And what about that keyboard guy on the left, is that Jimmy Fallon too?'

Needless to say, it wasn't until the entire performance was over and Jimmy Fallon came out to shake the hands of the band members that I realized no, this is not a joke. Jimmy Fallon is not EVERY member of The War on Drugs right now. Pretty dumb of me hey? Well because I was too stressed out and confused to enjoy the performance, I thought I would clear this up for anyone who is interested in actually enjoying the video.

WHY I LOVE RICK ROSS

My crew is constantly axing me, "Ali, what is it about Rick Ross that you love so much? Why is it that whenever one of his jams come on, that fat ass of yours just starts bumpin?"

I'm totally sick of trying to answer these questions when all I want to be doing is smoking a Rick Ross sized blunt and grinding my shit off. So I thought maybe on here, I could clear up any questions so I can just get back to gettin busy to The Bawss.

Friends can, and do hold me to previous statements that fat rappers are gross. Biggie, Big Pun, Fat Joe.. they all sound like they're enjoying a 'Double Down' while gettin busy in the studio. I stand by that statement. But for whatever reason, Rick Ross' fat ass voice is pleasing to me. The second I hear a song start with "run with me or run from me," "pussy's don't get pussy" or the classic "Maybach Music" my levels of serotonin start to rise and I get a rosy glow in my cheeks that starts in my heart.

Rick Ross's beats are huge. Layers upon layers of sounds, and electronics combined with REAL instruments, REAL! I'm not going to get too deep into this section because I think the part of my brain that is supposed to be able to differentiate, process and describe sounds is broken. But anyone that listens to The Bawss best agree that the beats are large. And amazing for walking to. I lived in Victoria this summer, right in the middle of tourist season. I had to walk from downtown, through the inner harbour to get to work each day. For those who haven't been to Victoria, from May through September, the downtown and inner harbor area is a cluster fuck of nerdy parents, (fanny packs and sweaters around their shoulders. Actually.) annoying children, asians with those enormous visors, buskers, horse and carriages and bike taxi's. Rick Ross helped me through the tough times when I wanted to murder everyone. (Why do people forget common walking etiquette when on holidays?) Instead of losing my temper, punting djembe's out of wannabe hippie busker kids' hands and face-pushing old ladies I would put on my headphones and find myself completely lost in the fat beats and voice of Rick Ross, feeling totally badass the whole way.

The video below is kind of crappy and pretty low budget. I remember watching it with my cousin this summer only for him to yell "HEY RICK ROSS, WHY DO YOU HAVE YOUR SHIRT ON IN THE POOL!?" However this was my #1 jam this summer.



I'm not going to lie and say Ricky Rawss the Bawss has deep and meaningful lyrics. I'm pretty sure he didn't have the tough ghetto life that many other rappers have experienced. He was a corrections officer, which is why Ross receives tons of criticism and peeps like to harsh on his legitimacy. (Back off y'all, Kanye had a good family and went to college and legitimacy is the one thing he isn't getting harassed about.) He hits up all the classics: bitches, smoking weed, cocaine, fancy cars, fucking and spending money. Nothing new. But the combination of Ross's huge beats and delivery make rapping what everybody else raps about into something exciting.

Location matters for Rick Ross too. Rappers are generally based out of LA or New York. They may take their 'soldiers' on vaycays to Miami, but rarely do we hear of rappers based in Florida. I get the feeling that Ross is basically on holidays 24/7. He's singin' about yacht clubs for Christ sakes! Where many rappers like to situate their videos in poor ghettos to reinforce the fact that they haven't had it easy and that they haven't forgotten where they came from, Ross's videos are always lavish, summer based, bikini clad and he's usually seen with a big fat stogie. This is basically a 'black Miami Vice' but 100x more intimidating. I'm just glad Ricky is being real with us, y'know? Not pretending that he spends his time slumming around Detroit, but instead shows himself having crazy yacht parties in Miami, like I am absolutely certain he does in real life.

Ross' songs also includes the perfect amount of cheesy R&B that I love so much. I'm a huge fan of The Weeknd and Frank Ocean, and Ross's album Deeper Than Rap delivers tons of silky smooth R&B samples that I like to listen to in the privacy of my car or bedroom, including the songs All I Really Want, Rich Off Cocaine, Lay Back, Bossy Lady, etc.

I've known for a long time that I'm a huge Bawss fan. It was only when I sat down to write this that I actually considered what it is that I love about the guy so much. It's Ross's combination of crass lyrics which make me feel more than just a shy and awkward middle class white girl, a fantasy-Miami lifestyle with disposable income, fat beats, husky build and beard, (not sure why it makes him better) and slow jam samples that turn this man into a Bawss.



Ross has just released a new mixtape, Rich Forever. I haven't given it a huge listen yet but I am definitely looking forward to doing so. This is my favorite jam so far:

Arabian Knights

Impossible Soul - Sufman Stevens

My lovely guy in Victoria text me telling me to listen to this song. I was skeptical at first. a) It's Sufjan Stevens and b) it's 25 minutes long.

BUT, it's so great! Getting ready in the morning? That takes 25ish minutes! I even extended my routine a little so I could hear the whole thing. With bleeding gums because I never floss I took all 25 minutes in and enjoyed every second. Around the 10 minute mark autotune kicks in. Normally my autotune rule of thumb is that its usually ok if Kanye or Weezy partake. James Blake is also allowed to fuck around with his voice. Anyone else generally sucks. But this part of the song has totally grown on me, and is now stuck in my head all the time. Then it's time for more uplifting chanty parts!

Maybe this song is cheesy... whatevs I'm smitten with it.

BFFFBFBFBFB

This is my best pal ever, Katy Slimmon the morning after last winters first snowfall. As was tradition for Wednesday mornings, we woke up in the 10th Street Emporium bleary eyed, exhausted, craving greasy food, whiney, reeking of cigarettes and me with scoliosis from sleeping on a shitty loveseat. (Why y'gotta be like that, Wednesday?) You know how that weirdo from American Beauty finds the garbage blowing in the wind all beautiful? Thats kind of how I see this picture.*

* - I am not calling Katy Slimmon a piece of garbage.

my most anticipated album

This "blind couple from Mali" is a married duo that has me pumped for their album release, Folila on March 27th. Although I didn't originally put two and two together (two pairs of blind-y shades) or catch on to their previous success (tons of music blog attention and "top lists" errwhurr) I sure know about them now. Their upcoming album is to feature favorites of mine, TV on the Radio, Theophilus London and (in the video below) Santogold.

This jam is so friggen amazing.  I want to listen to it eight more times, eat a shit ton of hearty food and then sleep for two and a half months until it's released. Then I will awake a slobby bear-woman and lose all the weight I've gained dancing alone in my room to Folila.